Coast Guard Memes That Will Make Anyone Laugh

Nothing beats a good Coast Guard meme, huh? There’s a whole bunch of hilarious military memes out there, and we’ve picked our favorite 15 Coast Guard memes. Enjoy!

The Coast Has Not Escaped

This iconic scene of a Marine recruit gone crazy in ‘Full Metal Jacket’ would be perfect for a military meme. But some like to use the words ‘Coast Guard’ in the literal sense. Private Lawrence keeps a watchful eye on the ‘coast’, which hasn’t escaped once in a long time.

Guarding the coast? Yes, the Coast Guard does exactly that. And they also patrol US waters to ensure that our country stays safe against enemies foreign and domestic. Semper paretus.

What I do…

There are some variations of the “What I do…” memes for the military. Yes, there’s even one for the ‘Coast Guard’. Of course, you have to laugh at the one where the other branches think that you just play in the water. The truth is, most ‘Coasties’ will usually be out in the water and on patrol for any threats or suspicious activity.

Or they could be pulling off rescue missions in dangerous conditions. That’s what they do so well.

Extended Warranty – Funny Coast Guard Meme

There are some Coast Guard memes that will take a shot at one of the other branches. Take the Navy, for instance. The Coast Guard makes daring diving rescues from helicopters. But when this Coastie decides to embark on a submarine, he has one goal in mind.

To remind the Submariners of their extended warranty (or so we think). Plus, it’s a play on those annoying telemarketing (or probably scammy) calls about those two words we dare not want to hear.

Not a real branch

You’ve probably heard this so many times from Sailors, Airmen, Soldiers, and Marines. But the Coast Guard is indeed one of the branches of the military. But this is a hilarious meme that could only be considered as self-deprecating humor for this branch in particular.

Coasties are indeed lifeguards. But they pull off rescues in the riskiest of conditions. So while this meme is quite funny, it should probably double as a compliment knowing what the Coast Guard usually does.

Not a real branch: Titanic Edition – Hilarious Coast Guard Meme

Once again, we poke fun at the so-called ‘Coast Guard is not a real branch’ charge. This time, we mix it together with an iconic scene from the 1997 blockbuster ‘Titanic’. The Coast Guard may not be ‘King of the World’, but this Coast Guard meme definitely takes the cake (frosting and all).

Who says that Coasties can’t have fun on the water? Just wait until we unveil some of the Coast Guard memes that troll the US Navy.

Interrupting Natural Selection

If we haven’t mentioned it already, we’ll say it again. The US Coast Guard goes on risky missions. Especially when the weather is bad and the waters are enough to toss a small craft around like a ragdoll. Sometimes, people make decisions that end up being the not so good ones (and can have fatal consequences).

But leave it to this branch to get there just in time to rescue the distressed crew so they can live another day.

When the Navy doesn’t want to do it – Coast Guard Meme

There is usually some beef between the Navy and the Coast Guard. When that happens, that’s when the memes between the two branches start popping up. The Coast Guard trolls the Navy for not doing the risky missions they normally do.

Needless to say, the Navy is no stranger to risky missions. They do rescue missions when near an emergency situation. Oh…and let’s not forget the Navy SEALs. They do dangerous missions that may be even riskier than a boat rescue.

The Most Interesting Coastie In The World…

There are plenty of missions that a Coastie does that may be considered “fun”. One example is taking part in a drug bust before the product reaches the shore. Other times, it’s rescuing a stranded boater when the conditions are calm. These are what they have to do whenever duty calls. Sometimes it’s fun and sometimes it isn’t.

While the ‘Most Interesting Man in the World’ is meme worthy in so many ways, we can’t help but share this one.

ASVAB Score

As yes, the ASVAB test. Where you have to have the required score or above to enlist in a military branch. The Coast Guard has the highest score requirement of them all (with 45 being the minimum). All other branches? In the 30s (with the Navy being the second highest at 35).

This meme once again pokes fun at the Navy’s ASVAB score. We told you we have plenty of memes of the Coast Guard trolling the Navy, didn’t we?

Drugs are bad – U.S. Coast Guard Meme

The Coast Guard gets involved with plenty of drug busts every year. Yet, the cat seems to get the last laugh here. How can they catch them when it’s an underwater submarine? This might just be a meme that the Coast Guard laughs at. But it’s less likely that they’ll see a drug smuggling submarine (even if they do exist).

If they do, their friends in the water (the Navy) might just give their Coastie buddies a heads up.

Worst day of your life so far – Funny Coast Guard Meme

Remember when you first arrived at the training center in Cape May? You might have asked yourself ‘what did I get myself into?’ followed by ‘this is going to suck’. But it’s only the beginning of your Coast Guard journey where you will reach so many different challenges (albeit physically demanding ones).

Boot camp is eight weeks in length (or 53 days to be exact). You may have some stories about your time there (even some of the worst moments).

Fake Branch – U.S. Coast Guard Meme

Everybody laughs when the Coast Guard says that they are a real branch. But when they come to the rescue, no one is laughing. They take risks the same way as any other branch in the military. No doubt about it, the rest of the military knows exactly who they are.

If you are a Coastie, you know you’ve heard the ‘fake branch’ charge a thousand times. But at the end of the day, you are part of the greatest military force in the world.

Gate Guard – Coast Guard Meme

When you cross into the gate and forget your ID, this is where things can get a bit awkward. Especially when the gate guard knows who you are. Imagine Thanos being a gate guard who threatens to wipe out the world the next time you forget your ID (perhaps that’s more than enough motivation to not forget).

Sometimes, a new gate guard may be on duty and may not actually know who you are. And that could cause quite the ruckus.

Blue Book – Funny Coast Guard Meme

Do you still have your Blue Book on hand? If so, good for you. The Coast Guardsman’s manual is like an American Express Card. You simply do not leave home without it. When a Coastie is stuck or not sure what to do, they always consult the ol’ Blue Book for the answer.

But it appears for this guy, it might seem like he’s having some issues with his navigation. Or maybe he just wants to call it a day. Is there something in the Blue Book about that?

No smoking – Funny Coast Guard Meme

Last but not least, we say farewell to our feline friend who seems to take a liking to the ‘No Smoking’ sign on most Coast Guard boats. It reads ‘No smoking, Safety First’. Or ‘No safety, smoking first’. Smoking is prohibited on Coast Guard boats (and perhaps for good reason).

Speaking of smoking, the Coast Guard takes boating safety very seriously. That means the use of marijuana on the water is illegal since it may impair the operator and their passengers.

Check out these funny Navy memes next!